Right from the beginning of Jay starting at this church he knew that he was called there for a transition but God never revealed what that transition was. We would have never guessed it would be having to confront the pastor on multiple things (not just personal issues but Scriptural things as well) and then needing to resign because nothing was going to change.
Monday, July 11, Jay resigned as the worship/youth pastor from our church. We had been there almost 3 yrs. My husband had to take a stand (not a very popular one) based on scripture. He sought council for weeks from several other pastors and professors more knowledgeable than himself and everyone affirmed him in the things he was seeing going on at our church, especially with our pastor. I would encourage all Christians, if you haven't, to spend time studying Timothy and Titus. It explains very clearly the qualifications of a Pastor. Jay followed Matthew 18 on approaching our Pastor and it went through just short of bringing everything to the church (because he wasn't allowed to, OK let's just take the Bible as suggestions, really???).
Anyways this was a very tough thing to do and a total God thing because it was not like we had another church just waiting to take him on and pay his salary. It was also extremely tough on our family because this church is full of people we love and care about and up until all of this I thought the feelings were mutual. They ogled over us, told us how much they loved us and then the Wednesday after it happened there were some that wouldn't even look at us. Really??? I had never felt so hurt. But I can't blame it all on them because they were only getting one side of the story, Jay was not allowed to tell his side. I think what concerns me more is that most people just heard what they wanted to hear and then didn't even question it. (Can I have some more Kool-aid please??) It would certainly raise red flags for me. But no, they wanted to do things in secret. At the business meeting some wanted secret ballots to vote if Jay was going to get any type of severance. Really that sounds cowardly to me and luckily that motion was struck down. Better yet I am so glad Jay and I were not there.
So that is the "yuck" in all of this and it will take time to get over and our emotions are on a roller coaster almost like the grieving process. But the good in all of it is Jay also has known for awhile that he has been called to plant a church. He was hoping it would be a plant like a "birthing" from our current church, not a "divorce" We are moving forward with that and Jay and I have partnered with our friends and have started holding worship services at their house as we look for a location. We have averaged 20 in attendance and are growing.
In all of this I try to leave God in control but I fail so much. It is so easy for me to try and take over and want to make all the plans....like where are we going to live, where is money coming from, will the church ever know the whole story, or will they even care? I just pray daily, and sometimes hourly, and keep giving the control back to God. I know He is in both the details and the big picture.
Please Pray for us in all of this: 1) Pray that we will find a house suitable for us (size wise and price wise) up in the valley, where the new church plant is. 2)Pray that Jay will be successful in going back to work with his dad to provide for our family as this new church grows. 3) Most of all pray for our old church the pastor and the congregation. I don't believe this is over. I believe that Jay started a transition there and I know God can do a mighty work and save that church.